Christmas time – everything could be so beautiful

During Advent and Christmas, more than 90 percent yearn for harmony and stillness, wish for tranquility and would like to spend more time with family and friends. But how does reality often look like: quarrels in the family and many people who are alone and  suffer from loneliness  .  Days off, good food, being with the people close to us – it really could all be nice. But instead: hectic and  stress is  spreading, the preparations have already robbed many of their nerves. There is no longer any real joy.

Why is this?

Expectations and reality are often far apart at Christmas. Too many expectations are linked to the reunion of family members, friends or relatives. The real feelings threaten to get lost in the Christmas shopping spree. Instead of hugging each other, they prefer to buy a gift, instead of nice words, there are still packages that are quickly obtained every year.

Many people have an almost glorified image of Christmas and completely overlook the fact that we all come to the holidays from a wide variety of situations and therefore bring very different needs with us. Christmas with the family is therefore a source of conflict: the parents want to be with the children, the children are drawn to friends.

Harmony at Christmas cannot be forced

The hoped-for atmosphere does not materialize, frustration spreads. Smoldering conflicts break out, family obligations are perceived as a burden. So, especially at the festival of love, there are always disappointments.

However, harmony cannot be forced. Therefore: Just enjoy the days as they are. Allow yourself and the other family members space and opportunities to retreat. Free yourself from the pressure of having to meet all obligations. Just say “no” once in a while.

Less is more

We have too much of the “good” – when it comes to eating, drinking and leisure time. But we don’t get enough exercise and fresh air, too little healthy nutrition and usually too little trust in our partners or family members. The fact is: Every German gains an average of 370 grams in weight between Christmas and New Year, while physical activity is usually neglected.

In order to clear possible stumbling blocks before the festival, it is useful to clarify in advance what the holidays should look like. If you are planning a special but not too lavish Christmas dinner, arrange an activity with the family every day, for example a walk or a sleigh ride. Distribute the tasks of preparation and daily work to all family members. So everyone is responsible for the success of the festival.

This is also Christmas – a time of solitude

Solitude is high during the holidays, because Christmas is a family celebration. For most of us this seems quite normal. But more and more people are spending the holidays alone and are losing almost all of their will to face life. Single people or people  suffering from depression  find this time particularly stressful.

Especially during Advent and Christmas, churches and communities offer many celebrations and meetings that can be of help to lonely people. But a visit to the local pub can also help to avoid becoming too melancholic at Christmas.

Rules of life of the Dalai Lama

At Christmas and New Year – when the balance of the year is taken – people take time to think about the new year, especially their new year. Rules of life provide orientation for the future. They can help to develop clear goals, find new meaning and see life in a larger context. Here are the Dalai Lama’s rules of life:

  • Note that great love and great success always come with great risk.
  • If you lose, never lose the lesson.
  • Always respect yourself, respect others, and take responsibility for your actions
  • Remember: Not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of luck
  • Learn the rules so you can break them properly.
  • Never let a small dispute destroy a great friendship.
  • When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate action to correct it.
  • Spend some time alone each day.
  • Open your arms to change, but don’t lose sight of your values.
  • Remember that sometimes silence is the best answer.
  • Live a good, honorable life. When you are older and think back, you will be able to enjoy it again.
  • A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation of your life.
  • In arguments with your loved ones, only talk about the current situation. Let the past be.
  • Share your knowledge with others. This is a good way to gain immortality.
  • Treat the earth with care. Once a year, go somewhere you’ve never been before.
  • Remember that the best relationship is one where each partner loves the other more than they need it.
  • Measure your success by what you had to give up for it.
  • Dedicate yourself to love and cooking with all your heart.

 

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